"You gotta beat it with a stick"

Your weekly Cramps with Garbageman.

Rob Kitchin reviews Philip Kerr's PRAGUE FATALE over at The View From The Blue House, Karen at Eurocrime says that Alexander McCall Smith's PRECIOUS AND THE MONKEYS is a delightful book and Maxine at Petrona calls Peter May's THE LEWIS MAN "a readable mystery with a tragic core".

Val McDermid celebrates her 25th book. Congratulations Val.

Lucy Liu to play Sherlock Holmes' sidekick John...errrrrr...Joan Watson.

Iain Banks at the Hexham Book Festival.

Lots of upcoming events for Alex Gray as she launches her new book A POUND OF FLESH. And both Alex and Caro Ramsay will be at the Lit Up Festival in Renfrewshire at the end of March.

Ian Rankin and Doug Johnstone's Twitter chat is quoted in the Independent.

Why I Really Like This Book features Josephine Tey's MISS PYM DISPOSES.

An excellent and funny article by Anthony Horowitz on whether authors still need publishers.

And, finally, 9 foreign words the English language really needs (hat tip to the lovely Steve Mosby). I must admit, I rather like Pilkkunnussja. I would add a 10th word - one that I was told when I was in Alaska - Slaqtaaq.

Her Love Rubbed Off

An apt Cramps title for the blog post today. And, to celebrate Valentine's Day, those lovely people at Pulp Press and For Books' Sake have reduced the price of the Short Stack anthology in the UK, or US for the day. What could be more romantic for Valentine's Day than giving your lover ten tales of brutal, ferocious crime fiction written by ten brutal, ferocious women? And if that's not cheap enough for you, you can win a copy here.

This weekend's cinematic viewing was the directorial debut of Paddy Considine, starring the brilliant Peter Mullan as Joseph - a man who is violent and brutal and shown as totally unlikeable right from the start (really, you have been warned), and the equally brilliant Olivia Colman as Christian charity shop volunteer Hannah - a woman with a secret. Harrowing, bleak and really, really sad. I was crying from the opening scene and was never far from a hanky for the rest of the film.

A review of Val McDermid's THE RETRIBUTION, two for M C Beaton with DEATH OF A PERFECT WIFE and AGATHA RAISIN AND THE QUICHE OF DEATH, and Groovy Daz with a groovy review of Ray Banks' DEAD MONEY.

Aly Monroe with one of her usual thoughtful and interesting posts - this one on character behaviour and reader reactions.

Huge congratulations to Helen Fitzgerald whose excellent THE DEVIL'S STAIRCASE goes into film production later this year.

Alex Gray on why crime fiction is the most borrowed genre in Britain's libraries. And The Scotsman considers the same topic and the legacy of William McIlvanney's Laidlaw.

Tony Black's THE STORM WITHOUT is to be published by a new independent publisher from Newcastle - McNidder and Grace.

And just in case you're looking for the perfect gift this Valentine's Day...

"People Ain't No Good"

Your Cramps title for today.

Soon, I will get back to blogging more than once a week. Soon...

This weekend, we watched Vietnamese film Three Seasons. It tells the stories of several characters - a girl whose job is to pick lotus flower and her relationship with her hermit employer, a cyclo driver and his infatuation with a prostitute, an American GI who is looking for someone, and a little boy who is a street peddlar. It's quite a slight film in many ways, but it's beautifully filmed and really interesting from the point of view of seeing a strange location.

The programme for the Aye Write! festival is now available and here are the crime fiction related events.

Friday 9th March
11am - 12.30pm or 4.30pm - 6pm - Helen Fitzgerald and Sergio Casci - Making the Pitch and Not Striking Out: From Pitch to Published (Creative Writing).
1pm - 2pm - Helen Fitzgerald and Sergio Casci - Book to Film and Film to Book: Adaptations (Creative Writing).
4.30pm - 5.30pm - Christopher Brookmyre - The Making of a Bestseller (Creative Writing)
6pm - 7pm - William McIlvanney.

Saturday 10th March
3.30pm - 4.30pm - Alex Gray and Ian Rankin: New Scottish Crime
8pm - 9.30pm - Panel Debate: Scotland's books - includes William McIlvanney

Sunday 11th March
3.30pm - 5pm - Panel Debate: What's Wrong With Women's Writing? - includes Karen Campbell.

Monday 12th March
7.30pm - 8.30pm - Alexander McCall Smith

Friday 16th March
9.30pm - 10.30pm - Mark Billingham and Christopher Brookmyre are Indiscreet

Saturday 17th March
2pm - 3pm - Gillain Galbraith and Karen Campbell - Ethics
3.30pm - 4.30pm - Lin Anderson and Caro Ramsay - Forensics

I think that's it - apologies if I've missed any!

And, in other news, K T McCaffery reviews Ian Rankin's THE IMPOSSIBLE DEAD, and the Sun Sentinel reviews Val McDermid's THE RETRIBUTION.

Irvine Welsh on his various projects, Jame McAvoy in FILTH, and a not particularly positive review of the ECSTASY film.

An interview with Philip Kerr.

Helen Fitzgerald blesses our libraries. And me too. My PLR is nowhere near as large as Helen's, but it took Ewan and I out for dinner at one of my favourite places, where I have discovered the joys of Hacienda de Chihuahua Crema de Sotol. Best of all though, is the thought that all those people were interested enough to borrow OLD DOGS. Thank you library users. That's the best thrill for me.

Finally, a final plea for any donations of books, or anything else for the helpline charity I volunteer for. All donations gratefully received for the charity raffle coming up. Thanks to everyone who has given stuff so far - I could hug you all. x

Has it really been a week?

Hello, world, I'd forgotten what you look like. You're really rather lovely, aren't you?

Essays are done, but were swiftly followed by more whooshing deadlines. This week's involved me sitting on a bus listening to conversations. This almost led to me getting my wee head kicked in. But it was fun. I also spent two and a half hours going through a large bin of shredded paper trying to piece together something which should never have been shredded. Successfully, I may add. I felt like I was in a really long, very boring version of CSI Glasgow.

Anyway, just a wee Scottish crime fiction update.

Some Sherlock stuff first: a review of the film A GAME OF SHADOWS, and another one, and Steven Moffat on the TV Sherlock (which I'm really enjoying).

Alex Gray, Caro Ramsay, G J Moffat and Craig Robertson at the Pitlochry Festival from January 27th.

A review of Ian Rankin's THE IMPOSSIBLE DEAD, one of Kate Atkinson's STARTED EARLY, TOOK MY DOG, Josephine Tey's THE MAN IN THE QUEUE and reviews of Alexander McCall Smith's THE FORGOTTEN AFFAIRS OF YOUTH and THE RIGHT ATTITUDE TO RAIN.

Peter May on the Quercus Couch.

Peter Rozovsky at Detectives Beyond Borders gets into Allan Guthrie's shorts.

A really interesting interview with Louise Welsh about Scotland.

Hopefully, I will get back to normal posting some time soon...maybe by July...

Queen of Pain

The Cramps again, of course.

I am now down at my parents to be spoiled over Christmas and it reminded me of a trip a few years ago. It's not just buses, you see. Public Transport and I have one of those love/hate relationships. I hate it, and it loves making my life a misery. Whenever I step on a train, or a plane, or a bus, or into a taxi, I take a deep breath and pray to everyone I can think of that I'm going to be sane at the end of the journey.

A couple of years ago I spent Christmas, as usual, in the soft and comfortable bosom of my family near Peterborough. After a wonderful time, we set off home. Now, I should state here that on Christmas Day I got the flu and I was feeling pretty ill. So I wasn't really looking forward to travelling anyway, but it was made all the worse by the fact that British Rail, in their infinite wisdom, had ripped up the railway tracks between York and Darlington, at the busiest time of year, so part of our train journey was done by bus.

Our seats were booked for the first part of the journey in Coach F. When the train arrived at Peterborough, we walked along past all the carriages - A, B, C, D, E, G, H. No F. So we walked back, just in case a tipsy carriage assembler had put coach F somewhere else. Still no Effing F. I spied a guard, a way up the platform, so, battling through the thronging hordes, and slamming myself into a pillar in the process (I didn't get transported to Platform 9 3/4 so I guess I won't be off to Hogwarts this term), I ascertained that Coach F was now Coach C through the miracles of Alphabet Soup so we managed to get a seat just before the train left.

At York, we all trooped out of the train, through a muddy bog that the station staff euphemistically referred to as 'car park' and onto buses. By this point we were already running 15 minutes late. Not to worry, said the guard on the train, the train would be waiting for us at Darlington. Absolutely. It definitely wouldn't be going anywhere until we arrived, we had his assurances on that.

So we all piled onto the bus. The bus was one of those posh ones, where you go down a little flight of stairs to the loo. Good, since by this time I was desperate to go to the loo. I walked up the bus and descended the stairs, only to hear the booming voice of the driver over the bus's tannoy "Could someone tell that woman that the toilet isn't working". About 17 people called down the stairs "Oy, you, the woman with the red face, the toilet isn't working."

We arrived at Darlington 40 minutes late to catch our connecting train (you remember, the one that on no account, absolutely definitely posilutely would not have left without us?), only to find that it had left without us, and the next one wasn't for another hour or so. Since we'd missed the train we had seats booked for, we didn't have seats booked for this one but there would be a whole load of people who would have had seats reserved. You could tell who they were - amongst the hordes of people on the platform they were the ones with really smug looks, the 4 bus loads of people who'd all arrived too late for our train just looked increasingly desperate, and were eyeing up those less fit than themselves, to determine their best chances of elbowing people out of the way to get a seat. By this time, I felt really, really awful, and promised the train guard (a different one from the lying sadist at York station) that I would vomit all over his shoes if he couldn't promise me a seat. He leaned over and whispered "I'll give you a tip since you're not well - Coach C has all the unbooked seats on it."

"My saviour. Thank you, thank you." I kissed his hands, sobbed into his British Rail jacket and promised him my uneaten British Rail sandwich (uneaten for very good reason I might add).

The train arrived. We sped down the platform past coaches H, G, F, E, D, B, A... D, B, A???? Had anyone reported this wholesale theft of railway carriages? Was someone, somewhere, setting up home in two cozy GNER carriages called F and C on a disused stretch of line somewhere between York and Darlington?

So, we grabbed seats in Coach D. I'm afraid I may have made rather a fool of myself as I clung to it sobbing "You'll never get me off this seat, never. Just leave me to die here. I've never harmed anyone." Anyway, it seemed to do the trick, no-one asked me to move for the whole journey. Not even the nice man in the white coat carrying the large butterfly net who hovered by my seat for the rest of the journey.

Now, enough of the nonsense. Scottish crime fiction news coming up.

Luca Veste over at Guilty Conscience talks about his top 5 books of 2011. Not only does he include Ray Banks' DEAD MONEY and Helen Fitzgerald's THE DONOR, but his number 1 is also one of my own favourite books of the year - the amazing BLACK FLOWERS by Steve Mosby. Luca obviously has excellent taste, I shall have to read the other two in his top 5 - Nick Quantrill's BROKEN DREAMS, and Neil White's COLD KILL.

More Ray, as The All Purpose Monkey muses over DEAD MONEY. And Ed Kurtz - another man with exceedingly good taste - picks it as one of his top books of 2011.

Doug Johnstone's busy year.

Conan Doyle's Moriarty on the big screen. And a review of A GAME OF SHADOWS.

Metaliterature reviews Philip Kerr's THE ONE FROM THE OTHER, Savidge Reads reviews M C Beaton's AGATHA RAISIN AND THE LOVE FROM HELL, and Crime Fiction Lover reviews Alex Gray's SLEEP LIKE THE DEAD.

Ian Rankin talks about which literary character he'd like to sleep with and other topics.

More on the Denise Mina comic book adaptation of the Stieg Larsson books. And more on the Unbound 26 Treasures project which Alexander McCall Smith is part of.

Irvine Welsh to write Britpop musical.

The Scotsman talks about their books of the year and note that Denise Mina and Ian Rankin show the "range of what the crime genre can do".

The Sunday Round-Up on a Sunday? How novel.

First of all, this weekend's film viewing. We saw THE FIGHTER with the always excellent Christian Bale. Really good film. Then it was a film that was so horrible that I don't even want to mention its name. I didn't watch most of it. Instead, at one point, I rushed out of the room saying "I can't watch this" and went and lay down on the bed and had a good cry. Silly cow, but it was truly horrible. After that, I needed a cinematic scouring brush to scrub my brain clean of that one, so we saw the quirky and touching GET LOW with Robert Duvall and Bill Murray.

I also spent some very pleasant kindle time with the lovely boys and girls from Radgepacket. I read volumes 1 and 2 while travelling on trains over the weekend and most excellent they were too. Reviews to follow. In the meantime, they are both over at Amazon for less than a quid.

And now, on to the Scottish crime fiction news.

The Mutant Bookshelf reviews Philip Kerr's FIELD GREY. And a review of the audio version of Charles Cumming's THE TRINITY SIX .

Congratulations to Alex Gray on her new book deal, and to Doctor Val McDermid.

Chris Ewan's audiobook narrator talks about the Good Thief series.

An interview with Jason Isaacs about his role as Kate Atkinson's Jackson Brodie.

Finally, a plea - if anyone has any suggestions for either writing exercises or groupwork exercises for both teenagers (from age 15-ish) and adults, please e-mail me! I'm looking for things which are fun and interesting and not too heavy.

Thursday Mish-Mash

The programme for the Edinburgh Book Festival will be revealed next week. And news that the Festival is to be sponsored by The Guardian. As part of the Fringe, Alexander McCall Smith's 44 SCOTLAND STREET is to be brought to the stage.

Meanwhile, the Fringe By The Sea festival is shaping up too - no book events on the actual site as yet; however, tickets are available for an event with Alex Gray and Karen Campbell on 12 August.

And a couple more events - Gillian Galbraith at the Robert Burns Birthplace Museum on 18th June, and Tony Black at the Carnegie Library in Ayr on June 14th.

Val McDermid talks about A PLACE OF EXECUTION on the BBC World Service.

Harper Collins are to publish two digital exclusives from Stuart MacBride.

Reviews of Christopher Brookmyre's WHERE THE BODIES ARE BURIED and Denise Mina's END OF THE WASP SEASON. And one of Pat McIntosh's THE COUNTERFEIT MADAM.

Ian Rankin is not happy with Radiohead.

An interview with Jason Isaacs - star of Kate Atkinson's CASE HISTORIES.

A lost Conan Doyle novel is set to be published.

And Helen Fitzgerald's Rules For Writers on The Release.

Alternative World Book Night

First of all, over at Confessions of A Mystery Novelist, Margot Kinberg is holding a book raffle in aid of the Christchurch earthquake relief.

Next, a reminder of Alternative World Book Night on Saturday. Just in case you can't be bothered to click, it's all about a book that you love and that you wish was better known. The idea is simple. If you're a blogger, post on Saturday (or Sunday, or Monday...) about a book you love to recommend to people and which you wish everyone knew about because it's so good. Tell us what it's about, and why you love it. Then give a copy of it away on your blog, in any way that you like. Let me know when you've posted and I'll link to them all here. If you're not a blogger, then I'm happy to host your book rave here at Badsville. Send it to me any time - just a paragraph about the book, and also let me know how you want to give it away. I'll then post yours when I post mine on Saturday (or Sunday, or Monday if you like - I'm not good with rules :o)). It's all about loving crime fiction and wanting to share our favourites.

And now, the crime fiction news.

The intrepid Douglas Lindsay changes a light bulb.

Win a copy of M C Beaton's DEATH OF A CHIMNEY SWEEP over at Mystery Scene Magazine.

The Badly-Behaved Guest - a short story by Alexander McCall Smith.

Several reviews of Scottish authors over at the wonderful Crimesquad HQ - Alex Gray's SLEEP LIKE THE DEAD, Doug Johnstone's SMOKEHEADS (which is next on my TBR list too), and Chris Ewan's THE GOOD THIEF'S GUIDE TO LAS VEGAS. Mysterious Reviews on Louise Welsh's NAMING THE BONES. And a review of Craig Robertson's RANDOM.

An excellent post from Nigel Bird over at Sea Minor, including a lovely wee charity book from a class of six-year olds.

Ian Rankin on writing comic books.

David Ashton's McLEVY on the radio.

Val McDermid will be appearing at the Brisbane Writers Festival. I feel that there should be an apostrophe in there...

Blogger Alyssa looks at how Kate Atkinson writes characters. And the FT reviews STARTED EARLY, TOOK MY DOG.

And now, I'm off for a lie down to try and recover from a yoga class in which we did the Cobra, the Cat, the Downward Dog, the Cow Face, the Warrior and the Eagle. Although, if you happened to be looking at me through the door you would think we did the Baby Hippo, the Baby Hippo, the Baby Hippo, the Baby Hippo With A Face Like A Cow, the Baby Hippo and the How The Hell Did The Baby Hippo Tie Herself In That Knot?

Tata for now, dear Reader.

Tartan Accents and Associated Randomness

Tony Black on Tartan Noir in The Scotsman.

Gordon Ferris' readers struggle with the accent. 'At's braw, ye ken? And, talking of accents, how about this (via the lovely Michael Malone). It reminds me of the first time I went to visit my friend Bobbie in Illinois and my luggage didn't arrive (as opposed to the second time I went to visit Bobbie in Illinois and my luggage didn't arrive). The nice lady at the Whoops, We've Misplaced Your Luggage place gave me a number to ring. It was an automated number. The nice robot asked me my surname.

"Moore", I said.

"I'm sorry, did you say HUANG?" said the automated voice.

"No, I said Moore" I said patiently.

"I'm sorry, did you say IRRGZ?" said the automated voice

"No, I said MOORE" I said.

Silence and a few clicks on the phone.The nice robot decided to try a different tack. "Please give your reference number."

"5 4 8 Z P O X" I said.

"I'm sorry, did you say 3 7 9 Q W A D?"

"No, I said 5 4 8 Z P O X."

"I'm sorry, did you say 6 1 2 N Y K L?"

I decided to try an American accent, to see if this would work. I was quite impressed with myself.

"I'm sorry, did you say your name was Scarlett O'Hara and that you were from Brooklyn?" said the voice, not sorry at all.

A review of Alex Gray's SLEEP LIKE THE DEAD. And the Nerd of Noir reviews CALIFORNIA by Ray Banks.

Philip Kerr will be appearing at the Boston Public Library on April 21st. And Gillian Galbraith will be doing a short library tour of Edinburgh (that's a short tour, not a short library). And, talking of tours, how about the Bookworm's Tour of Scotland? Hmmmmm, not much crime fiction there, methinks.

Margot Kinberg puts the spotlight rather splendidly on Ian Rankin's EXIT MUSIC.

That Friday Feeling

Several Scottish crime fiction events on World Book Night. Apart from the Aye Write events, Christopher Brookmyre is in Perth, while Karen Campbell, Helen Fitzgerald and errrr...me...are at the wonderful Glasgow Women's Library in the evening. More details on that as I have them.

Talking of World Book Night, here's a reminder of Alternative World Book Night. All you need to do is recommend a book you wish was better known, and give a copy away (and let me know you're in so I can list it here at Badsville).

Charles Cumming on espionage.

The Oxford Times reviews Val McDermid's TRICK OF THE DARK.

Alex Gray, Tony Black and Gordon Brown get tips from the inmates of the Bar-L. Great article.

Alexander McCall Smith at the Fayetteville Public Library on April 8th.

Scots are being urged to show support for their local library.

And, finally, some spooky Edinburgh tours.

Have a lovely weekend, dear Reader.

Flu, Apps and Alternative World Book Night

I should be in Edinburgh this evening for the launch of Tony Black's fantastic TRUTH LIES BLEEDING (review to follow). Instead, I am in bed with the flu. And very grumpy. In the meantime, here's Tony talking about the new book over at Do Some Damage.

Allan Guthrie talks to Spinetingler about e-books, and to Paul Brazill about all sorts of stuff. Spinetingler also talks to Nigel Bird about e-publishing his short story collection DIRTY OLD TOWN.

And Ian Rankin talks to his twitter followers about lunch with his publishers.

Alexander McCall Smith has joined Ian Rankin in having his own i-phone app. I have an i-phone, I love technology, but I've never downloaded a single app. Am I missing some good stuff, dear Reader?

Alex Gray talks to the Paisley Daily Express about her new book SLEEP LIKE THE DEAD.

The Mystery Librarian reviews BUSY BODY by M C Beaton.

Ian Rankin apparently cures DAD.

And, finally, just a reminder of Alternative World Book Night. All you need to do is recommend a book you wish was better known, and give a copy away (and let me know you're in so I can list it here at Badsville.

So random, I can't even think of a title

The Crimefest programme is finalised. Moderators and panellists will shortly be getting e-mails and then it will be going up on the website. I have a fiendish piece of homework for my panellists. Little do they know - bwahahahahaha.

Ian Rankin gets lyrical for Let's Get Lyrical.

Lots of reviews today. First of all a couple from Karen over at How Mysterious! - Caro Ramsay's ABSOLUTION and Alexander McCall Smith's THE CHARMING QUIRKS OF OTHERS.

Next, a review of Kate Atkinson's STARTED EARLY, TOOK MY DOG, and another. LoveReading on Val McDermid's TRICK OF THE DARK. Sugar Creek Cottage reviews M C Beaton's DEATH OF A MAID, and the lovely Bernadette over at Reactions To Reading really enjoyed Christopher Brookmyre's PANDAEMONIUM.

And here's a review of Allan Guthrie's BYE BYE BABY, which is currently number 10 on Amazon's Kindle list. Let's see if we can get it to number 1.

Nigel Bird's debut short story collection is out and getting some nice comments.

Seventy years after his death, The Scotsman wonders why John Buchan doesn't get as much notice he deserves.

If you want to catch Alex Gray out and about she's doing a few events over the next few months - including a trip to Barlinnie on February 15th (which, I guess, doesn't so much count as 'out and about' as 'banged up'. You might find that one a bit difficult to attend without a prior reservation. Incidentally, she's doing that one with Tony Black and Gordon Brown. I do believe we're only missing Mr Pink and Mr Orange for a full cast list.

Talking of Tony Black, he's just signed up with the glorious Pulp Press to write a novella for them. No news on what it's about yet, but I for one can't wait. Although, of course, I'll have to. Oh, and by the way, I've just finished Tony's new one - TRUTH LIES BLEEDING - which is due out next week, is bloody brilliant. Review to follow.

And, finally, Helen Fitzgerald on being rejected. Oh, and Helen...I love you and I am in love with you.

Have a lovely weekend, Dear Reader.

Aye, Right, it's Aye Write

First of all, this weekend's film viewing. First was a French film called Harry, un ami qui vous veut du bien. The English title - although sticking reasonably close to the French - was the rather rubbish - Harry, He's Here To Help. Don't let the title put you off. It's a lovely little witty psychological thriller. A French family, on the way to the holiday home which they are doing up, meet up with an old school-friend of the husband, Michel. Michel has only the vaguest memories of Harry, but Harry seems to be rather more...obsessed... with Michel. Hitchcockian suspense, black comedy, and nicely low-key. Our next film was The Disappearance of Alice Creed - a claustrophobic British thriller with a cast of three and which mostly takes place in one room - a room where two men take a young woman and hold her hostage, in order to extract a large ransom from her rich father. A good (but not great) thriller - gritty and twisty but lacking in something. I didn't care enough about any of the characters. Well worth a watch, though.

The Aye Write programme is up. From a quick look through, the crime related events are (I've put a * by the ones I'm planning on attending, if anyone fancies meeting up):

Friday March 4th
Jasper Fforde - 18.00 - 19.00

Saturday March 5th
Alexander McCall Smith - 10.30-11.30
Denise Mina, Karen Campbell, Caro Ramsay - 14.00-15.00 *
Alex Gray, Louise Welsh, Alice Thompson - 15.30-16.30 *
Mark Billingham and Jo Nesbo - 19.00-20.00

Sunday March 6th
Val McDermid - 17.00-18.00 *

Monday March 7th
Allan Guthrie, Denise Mina, Louise Welsh - 19.30-20.30 *

Tuesday March 8th
Kevin MacNeil - 18.00-19.00 (not sure if it's crime fiction but one description calls it a 'dark, maniacal thriller'. It looks excellent. *
Doug Johnstone - 19.30-20.30 *

Friday March 11th
Christopher Brookmyre - 21.00-23.00

Saturday March 12th
Iain M Banks and Ken MacLeod 14.00-15.00 (although this one is more SF)
Neil Forsyth - 15.30-16.30 (more his comedy than crime fiction)

I think that's it, but if I've missed anything, please let me know.

And another event, on 4th February Louise Welsh at the GFT talking about Robert Louis Stevenson and the Theatre of The Brain.

And now, a few reviews. First of all, a very thoughtful and interesting review of Stuart MacBride's SHATTER THE BONES, The Star Online reviews Ian Rankin's THE COMPLAINTS, and the lovely Dorte enjoys John Buchan's THE THIRTY-NINE STEPS.

Ian Rankin, amongst others, talks about turning fifty.

And, finally, David Thomas in The Mail on The Pitbull of The Baskervilles.

A Scottish Crime Writers' Festival? Yes, please

Peter Guttridge with a report from the Edinburgh Book Festival, including the exciting snippet that Alex Gray and Lin Anderson are planning a crime writers' festival in Scotland. Marvellous. And so, dear reader, who would you like to see on a panel and what would the topic be?

Ian Rankin reviews the Edinburgh Festival. And Lisa Dempster on the British Council's Bookcase Conference.

An excellent piece on Ann Cleeves' Scottish based Shetland quartet.

The Herald reviews Caro Ramsay's DARK WATER (and a headline that needs editing) and Reading Journal enjoyed Nicola Upson's ANGEL WITH TWO FACES, featuring Josephine Tey as detective.

More on the Vic Godard and Irvine Welsh collaboration.

100 Degrees at Midnight reviews IF THE DEAD RISE NOT by Philip Kerr, and an excellent post from Alastair Rickard on Kerr's Bernie Gunther novels. I'll say it again - whatever my Mum says about the internet (or 'the microwave' as she calls it) it's brilliant that people who feel passionate about books take the time to share that passion.

And, a propos of absolutely nothing, I found this story fascinating (hat tip to @ZiggyKinsella). It reminds me of the wonderfully funny LUST LIZARD OF MELANCHOLY COVE by Christopher Moore. I wonder if any serious crime fiction has been written on the same topic - anyone got any thoughts?

National Crime Fiction Week

It's National Crime Fiction Week from 14th to 20th June. Here are the crime fiction events with a Scottish connection. Contact details at the site.

Monday - 14th June

7.00 pm

Alex Gray at Falkirk Library, Hope Street, Falkirk, FK1 5AU
Tickets £2, available from Falkirk Council Libraries.

7.30 pm

'Lady Killers' - Aline Templeton Glenwood Library, Glenrothes, Fife
Tickets cost £2.50 (£2 for super and premier fifestyle cardholders) which includes refreshments. Booking advisable.

7.30 pm

Book Group Social Evening: Read any book in the series by Jo Nesbø and join in our evening discussion at the Carnegie Library, 12 Main Street, Ayr, KA8 8EB; (their blog)
Tickets are £2 (includes refreshments), available from Carnegie Library.

Tuesday - 15th June

2.00 pm

Round Old Ayr Crime Walk Led by Tom Barclay: Meet at the Carnegie Library, 12 Main Street, Ayr, KA8 8EB; (their blog)
Come with local history librarian Tom Barclay on a walking tour of town centre sites associated with the rebels, smugglers, body-snatchers, common criminals and thief-takers who have all played dramatic parts in the town's colourful past.
Tickets are £2 (includes refreshments), available from Carnegie Library.

7.00 pm

G J Moffat will discuss his writing, read from his new thriller Fallout and answer questions from the audience at the Carnegie Library, 12 Main Street, Ayr, KA8 8EB
For information about ticket pricing, and to book, please contact Carnegie Library.

7.30 pm

Tony Black, Karen Campbell and Helen Fitzgerald at Soutar Theatre, AK Bell Library, York Place, Perth, PH2 8EP
Tickets costing £5.00 are available from the AK Bell Library. Booking is advisable.

Wednesday - 16th June

6.00 pm

Quintin Jardine, Alex Dryden and Barbara Nadel at Idea Store, Canary Wharf, Churchill Place, Canary Wharf, London E14 5RB
Capital Crimes - Crime scene - books from around the World
No need to book.

7.00 pm

Murder Mystery Night 'A Body in the Library' at Troon Library, 5 South Beach, Troon, KA10 6EF; (their blog)
Written by members of Ayr Writers' Club and performed by willing volunteers.
Tickets £3 (including refreshments), available from Troon Library.

7.30 pm

'Lady Killers' - Karen Campbell Glenwood Library, Glenrothes, Fife
Tickets cost £2.50 (£2 for super and premier fifestyle cardholders) which includes refreshments. Booking advisable.

Thursday - 17th June

7.00 pm

Round Old Ayr Crime Walk Led by Tom Barclay: Meet at the Carnegie Library, 12 Main Street, Ayr, KA8 8EB; (their blog)
Come with local history librarian Tom Barclay on a walking tour of town centre sites associated with the rebels, smugglers, body-snatchers, common criminals and thief-takers who have all played dramatic parts in the town's colourful past.
Tickets are £2 (includes refreshments), available from Carnegie Library.

7.30 pm

'Lady Killers' - Gillian Galbraith Glenwood Library, Glenrothes, Fife
Tickets cost £2.50 (£2 for super and premier fifestyle cardholders) which includes refreshments. Booking advisable.

Friday - 18th June

7.00 pm

Murder Mystery Night 'A Body in the Library' at Carnegie Library, 12 Main Street, Ayr, KA8 8EB; (their blog)
Written by members of Ayr Writers' Club and performed by the staff of Carnegie Library.
Tickets are £3 (includes refreshments), available from Carnegie Library.

Saturday 19th June

10.00 am - 4.00 pm

Crime writing workshop with Sue Walker Guildford Library, 77 North Street, Guildford, Surrey, GU1 4AL
How to write a crime novel in one day. Investigative television journalist and novelist Sue Walker explains what makes a good crime story and how to keep your readers hooked and guessing from gripping opening to breathtaking denouement. Be prepared to undertake writing exercises. Suitable for everyone.
Tickets £15 (not including lunch) available six weeks before the event from Guildford Library in person or by e-mail or telephone.

2.30 pm - 4.00 pm

'Help ma Bob - there's been a MURDER!' - Forensic Science Crafts for Kids at at Carnegie Library, 12 Main Street, Ayr, KA8 8EB; (their blog)
Qualify as a South Ayrshire Crime Scene Investigator and get your badge to prove it. Discover how CSI investigators interpret paper chromatography, dust for fingerprints, handwriting analysis and blood splatter evidence. Suitable for ages 8 - 11 years
Entry is FREE, but booking is essential - sign up at Carnegie Library before the event.

Hotels, heckles and hamsters...oh, and some crime fiction

This sounds great - Writing Your Crime Novel - Seven Steps To Success - a crime writing workshop hosted by Tony Black with a special guest appearance from Allan Guthrie. I wonder if he'll be doing his usual turn with the... errrr...self-pleasuring hamster (it's a true story - ask him when you see him)

Quintin Jardine at Kelso Library on June 10th talking about his new book, RUSH OF BLOOD (which, I suppose, brings us back to that hamster).

Building plans for Arthur Conan Doyle's former home. Wouldn't it be good to have it developed as a themed hotel?

Aly Monroe on the Philip Kerr and Alan Massie Reviewgate.

I'm not convinced that Denise Mina and Allan Guthrie will be talking about the crisis in Sudan (despite what the article seems to suggest), but I'm sure they'll be talking about writing at the Nairn Book and Arts Festival this weekend.

For those who like to keep up with what's happening at the various Edinburgh Festivals, there's a Festival Blog.

Eurocrime reviews Alex Gray's FIVE WAYS TO KILL A MAN.

And, finally, this is what always happens to my luggage too.

Have a lovely weekend all.

The Plumber Reviews...

My Dad has now decided to open my blog up further on the reviewing front. In the comments section of the previous post he says "The Mermaids Singing I passed on to the Electrician who came to fit a new light in the hall. 'Oh!' he said 'I haven't read that one, I like Val McDermid' so maybe I will get him to do a review sometime." So there you go. That blog feature will no longer be called My Dad Reviews, but My Dad's Electrician Reviews.

A review of Alexander McCall Smith's No 1 Ladies Detective Agency. And he's appearing at the Vancouver International Writers' Festival in August.

Alex Gray talks to the Glasgow Herald about her health. While Suite 101 reviews GLASGOW KISS.

Louise Welsh is appearing at the Mitchell Library on 17th June as part of Refugee Week.

A few reviews for this round-up - Pat McIntosh's HARPER'S QUINE, Alexander McCall Smith's DOUBLE COMFORT SAFARI CLUB, and Lin Anderson's FINAL CUT and a lovely review of OLD DOGS over at Crimesquad. Thank you guys!

Whoops - Philip Kerr bites back after receiving bad reviews from Scottish writer Allan Massie. And here he is talking to German TV about his books.

And finally, a report from Aberdeen's Word Festival. And on a (fruitless) search of the Internet for William McIlvanney's Frankenstein's monster meets drunk Glaswegian poem, I found this interesting article on the roots of Scottish noir.

Titbits and Title Tattle

A round up of forthcoming book festivals in Scotland, an a more in-depth run-down of the Wigtown Book Festival in September from The List (I am desperately hoping to go and see Nick Cave in Dundee).

Shari Low with praise for Alex Gray's FIVE WAYS TO KILL A MAN and Karen Campbell's SHADOWPLAY in the Daily Record. The Daily Record also reports on Alex Gray'svisit to Barlinnie Prison in which she apparently got some stick over writing about crime when she has never committed one.

If you're in Stoke Newington next week, why not go and see Louise Welsh along with Mark Billingham, Dreda Say Mitchell and Toby Litt.

Here's a Conversation With Quintin Jardine.

The lovely Declan Burke - one of my favourite authors, and all-round top bloke - has lovely things to say about OLD DOGS. Thank you Dec, I owe you a hug.

Over at The Guardian, gearing up for the Hay Festival the Guardian asks various authors, including Ian Rankin, for the answers to questions they never get asked. Amongst the others, Jonathan Coe says 2010 is the year for comic fiction - yay! And I particularly like Roddy Doyle's list of questions he can't believe he was actually asked.

Brandy Purdy reviews Louise Welsh's TAMBURLAINE MUST DIE.

What happens to a 14 year old Sherlock Holmes to turn him into the person he is?

And, finally, I've been thinking about book titles recently, as I've been trying to come up with a title for one of my current WIPs (I'm currently working - very slowly I might add - on two books). This particular one is at the very early stages (ie at the stage of lying on the sofa with my eyes closed thinking about it) but today, after some brainstorming over lunch, and me telling wan what it was about, we came up with two titles WALK ON THE WILD SIDE and BEAT THE DEVIL'S TATTOO. Both fit the premise I have in mind, but one would take it a more serious route than the other. I guess I will just have to write the book and see whether it's funny or not. So, dear reader, are titles important? What sort of titles attract your attention? What titles or sort of titles turn you off?

Crime Writers Out And About

A quick update on Scottish crime fiction news before I head off to Crimefest. Hopefully I will blog from there.

Craig Russell takes viewers behind the scenes of BROTHERS GRIMM.

Karen Campbell impressed at Balloch Library. I'm really looking forward to her new one - SHADOWPLAY.

Alex Gray will be in Aberdeen on Wednesday, to discuss her new book FIVE WAYS TO KILL A MAN. And, also in Aberdeen, as part of the Word Festival, are Denise Mina and Philip Kerr.

Ian Pattison creates a stageplay about death.

Barry Forshaw at The Independent reviews Stuart MacBride's DARK BLOOD.

Val McDermid talks Agatha Christie at Hay.

And, finally, the Herald reports that Scottish publishers may go the way of the dodo.

Football, Flashers and Flying Across the Clyde

Craig Robertson and others talk baddies to Bookdagger.

Edinburgh's Tales of One City has a Youtube channel. See Iain Banks, Doug Johnstone, Irvine Welsh and much more (thanks to @scottishbooks) .

Ian Rankin - celebrity whale watcher. And he is great to follow on Twitter "Apparently, my brand new Inspector Rebus short story, 'The Very Last Drop', will be published in Friday's 'Scotsman' newspaper", he says. Yippee! He also says: "wondering if the couple who won me on ebay left positive feedback..."

A great article in The Guardian on John Buchan's Richard Hannay books.

The lovely Karen over at Eurocrime comments on several books with a football focus, including books by Scots Bill Knox, Alex Gray and Alexander McCall Smith.

More from The Scotsman on Creative Scotland and the potential pitfalls which need to be avoided.

A reminder of a rather excellent sounding event with Ray Banks on Friday if you are in London.

Booksquawk reviews THE DARKNESS by Bill Kirton. The South African Times Live reviews Ian Rankin and Philip Kerr. And the delightful Bernadette in Oz enjoyed Caro Ramsay's SINGING TO THE DEAD, but has a double pronged rant about authors who do not update their websites and how all Scottish authors end up being called "the next Ian Rankin", even when they patently aren't. Well said, that woman.

The Chicago Tribune on why mysteries still matter.

Carol Anne Davies on a recent Home Office report which recommends that police stop talking about crime because it upsets people. Her story of being flashed at reminds me of when a friend and I were once flashed at in the Pere Lachaise Cemetery in Paris.

And, finally, there's only a week or so to go, so I'm getting as many plugs in as possible for my death defying plunge across the River Clyde on a piece of string. All sponsorship or encouraging comments gratefully received.